Girl anecdote, the cure, music, least fave song, anxiety....
Electronics shopping
Thursday August 7, 2003
Posted by: ridgecliff (10:12:14 PM EDT)
Jessica was like: my cup size is like a children's book title
Jessica was like: "The Littlest B"
Jessica was like: haha
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we're getting close. anyway so today i was at circuit city getting a dvd player. and i dont know shit about electronics, i just look for the longest list of things it can do and reasonable prices. so it was down to the Zenith one and the Panasonic one, and they could both do the exact same things, and they were the same price. So, rather than making a really savvy informed decision by consulting a worker or anything, I reasoned that the Zenith one had the cutest and most user-friendly remote control, and thus I got the Zenith. Am I being really airheaded and girly here? I mean, they could both do the same things, but if I'm buying an appliance, I want to know I can easily navigate the colorful remote control. Anyway, I felt okay about the purchase, and my brother looked it over and said it was fine, but I stil felt like such a dumb girl in that moment of decision.
Depressing vibes, least favorite song
Sunday August 3, 2003
Posted by: ridgecliff (8:51:58 PM EDT)
I'm happy to be getting back to school. Although for the first time in my life I'm not nervous about meeting new people but rather- excited, I've got this nervousness going that I just can't understand or explain. I feel like a little animal backed into a dark corner, and I'm looking at the light outside and it looks so pretty and appealing but I dont wanna leave the dark corner for some goddamned little-animal reason.
I realized that I am done with drama. I have done drama and I am done with it. Not acting, just all that soap opera bullshit, I'm so sick of it, I feel so old this summer, I'm just done with all that extraneous crap.
http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Trailer/4495/
ROB LOWE!!!!!!! see above!
Presently, my least favorite song is "im already there" by lonestar. cute song, i'll give it that much. but i fucking hate it now due to the circumstances. use your imagination.
He called her on the road
From a lonely cold hotel room
Just to hear her say I love you one more time
But when he heard the sound
Of the kids laughing in the background
He had to wipe away a tear from his eye
A little voice came on the phone
Said "Daddy when you coming home"
He said the first thing that came to his mind
I'm already there
Take a look around
I'm the sunshine in your hair
I'm the shadow on the ground
I'm the whisper in the wind
I'm your imaginary friend
And I know I'm in your prayers
Oh I'm already there
She got back on the phone
Said I really miss you darling
Don't worry about the kids they'll be alright
Wish I was in your arms
Lying right there beside you
But I know that I'll be in your dreams tonight
And I'll gently kiss your lips
Touch you with my fingertips
So turn out the light and close your eyes
I'm already there
Don't make a sound
I'm the beat in your heart
I'm the moonlight shining down
I'm the whisper in the wind
And I'll be there until the end
Can you feel the love that we share
Oh I'm already there
We may be a thousand miles apart
But I'll be with you wherever you are
I'm already there
Take a look around
I'm the sunshine in your hair
I'm the shadow on the ground
I'm the whisper in the wind
And I'll be there until the end
Can you feel the love that we share
Oh I'm already there
Oh I'm already
There
Two random thoughts
Saturday August 2, 2003
Posted by: ridgecliff (12:08:24 AM EDT)
on the way to work i was behind one of those huge astrogalaxy or whatever they're called minivans, the kind with the curtains, you know what im saying? where every surface is carpeted? yes, and in the back window of the van there lay a cardboard placard that said BON JOVI FOREVER in magic marker. certainly got me chuckling.
i hate it when friends come out of the bathroom, and they high five you or shake your hand or whatever...and their hand is vaguely moist. and you catch yourself wondering if that's a not-completely-dried-off WASHED hand, or if it's....well you know what i'm hinting at.
Just some stuff, and The Cure
Monday July 28, 2003
Posted by: ridgecliff (3:37:01 PM EDT)
So I came home last night and my drunk mom made me write her a cover letter for her resume, since she is now searching for a job. And as I'm looking over her CV and thoughtfully editing the stuff on my laptop, she is sitting at the table bantering like she SO loves to do. On and on, singsong bullshit, talking to the dog, asking me the same things like 10 times in a row, chugging her chablis, and I go Mom, can you please be quiet for five minutes so I can get this done? And she looks all offended and pissed off, and spouts off some shit like "WHATS WRONG WITH YOU WHY CAN'T YOU MULTITASK YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO MULTITASK BLAH BLAH BLAH" and then I'm like "Look, do you want me to shit this out because I couldn't concentrate because I was too busy listening to your banter, or can you keep quiet for five minutes and have it be quality? I'm doing you a favor!" She kept talking.
Been downloading some Replacements stuff, checking it out. I'd had one song of theirs for years but it was totally different from the rest of their stuff. Gotta love alt country with a twang and some tongue in cheek humor, but still haven't come up with a solid conclusion. Some bands I think I'd automatically like more if I was a boy, and this is one of them.
Okay, so this is big, at least in my mind:
After...6 1/2 years of fandom for The Cure, I acquired my first piece of band merchandise. This is big, you can't just wear any band t shirt, unless you're one of those poser short skinny boys who wear those tiiiight "vintage" t shirts with the dumbass logos. Like the Care Bears and stuff, makes you be like "aw, they're sensitive and in touch w/ their childhood" when essentially it's just dumb.
But so back to this t shirt. I got it on Ebay, and I'm amazed because all shirts on ebay are like XXXL and I found a Medium! It is, of course, being a Cure shirt...Black with Red lettering. (colors are proper nouns in this case apparently) and...although I enjoy both of those colors immensely, I dunno. I hate how the Cure has a "goth band" reputation. It's definitely not! Well at least not completely. Download one of my favorites, From the Edge of the Deep Green Sea. It's an epic. Like the Cure's version of November Rain, GnR if you know what I'm saying.
But so I was talking to Cam about this shirt, and I was kinda joking like "I dont want any goth kids thinking I'm one of them too" and then I realized there are no Goth kids in Boulder. He made fun of me in this Robert Smith (lead singer) voice, like some kid coming up to me like "I'm melancholy, too!" I haven't worn it yet. Actually I am not sure where I put it come to think...plus black is hot. In a temperature way. But I'm excited about it, beacuse it'll be a grand way to network with fellow Cure fans, and although I have only met a handful in my life, they're usually amazing.
get:
from the edge of the deep green sea, The Cure
oh sally, whiskeytown. i love the guitar.
i can by Nas. It's addicting, even though i HATE it.
to sheila, smashing pumpkinds. did you know that until like, age 16 i thought SP was some violent deathmetal band because of the name? God im misled. I only like their mellow stuff, though. and isn't that slippery DJing noise in the beginning of Perfect just INFECTIOUS?
and get some sinatra. he's always awesome. Coltrane too.
oh apparently, i just discovered this.....justjessica is also the name of some porn site. i wonder how many married pervs have accidentally wound up here.
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Just home from work, and I was listening to the Cure, Disintegration...amazing album. And I realized that, if I had to use two words to describe this group it wouldnt' be "goth band" it'd be "fucking brilliant."
And as I was listening to stunning track two, "pictures of you" which i absolutely adore, i realized maybe on a psychological level, the entry into journalism might be some kind of effort, psychologically, to rewrite the past. Cuz there's this line in that song that goes "If only I thought of the right words, I could have held on to your heart. If only I thought of the right words, I wouldn't be breaking apart." And that hits me all the time. Whenever there's a loss I'm always like well if i had only said the right goddamn things. anyway, get that song.
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